Filter it (Monday motivation)

Sunny cheers to a “new beginning”.
To trying again.
To starting over.

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Because May 13th is as good as January 1st in my book.

Because I am fed up with how impossible I make my own life. How, purposely, I push myself away from happiness. “When I lose my excess fat, I will….”

BUZZ OFF.

Yes, I am hella uncomfortable in my skin. Yes, I freak out when I am meeting with people I haven’t seen in months, fearing their judgement. Yes, I grew out of all my clothes and I can’t face shopping for new ones.

Yes, I AM STRUGGLING.

But that’s nothing new now, is it?

So I will stop making excuses. Stop hiding and running.

I can’t even run if my life depended on it, so how does it make sense to run from it?

I can find my happy place back. I will. And until then, I’ll just instagramfilter it so it at least looks pwetty.

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It’s a long, shitty and bumpy road. Least we can do, is do it in style. Join me in my pink limousine? I got us two, just in case.
 

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11 thoughts on “Filter it (Monday motivation)

  1. I’m donning my rose coloured glasses in order to join you in the back of that rosy pink limo. ‘Fake it til you make it’ definitely helps to some degree. I’m also in agreement that May 13 is as good a first day as January 1. In fact, every day is a new day and a fresh start :)
    I completely believe in you – I have faith you can turn this around.
    And – the only person who judges you that harshly is yourself. Other people truly don’t notice all the things you are so hyper aware of. They just see this amazing, kind, funny, loveable wonderful girl called Sooz <3 <3

    • Thank you Fi! We used to have a (SUPER CHEESY) famous Dutch song about seeing life through pink glasses hihi.

      I am (was?) a strong believer of fake it until you make it, because I (still!) strongly believe in the power of self-belief/discourse/thought patterns, however, the “faking” part is starting to bother me. I want to be done with ‘faking’, and start being.. real.

  2. Im there, blinging it up in my DINOsuit. sometimes we just have to grin and bear it… its not easy and my GOD will we be screaming inside. but put on some nice clothes, do your hair and makeup and like fiona said – “fake it till you make it!”….
    cos we will make it, espesh in a hot pink ride like that one :)
    x

  3. I’ll get in the limo, every day a new sun comes up, each day we can choose to do the best we can, ( not someone else’s best , but best, for where ever we are! ) I often want to scream inside and ‘get out of my body’, I think Fiona is correct, judgement of ourselves is the harshest , in my opinion , an ED has the narstiest , cruelest monster. I try to remember how much it LIES! Sending support, and booking a place in the pink limo, can I wear a bright pink stirt?? ….lol
    Love Ziggy
    p.s I have faith in you, you have learnt lots, inside you are truly beautiful , even if you are unable to see it, others CAN!!!

    • “Be a first class version of yourself instead of a second class version of someone else”, right?

      True, my awareness of bodies ONLY applies to me, a lot of ppl have actually commented on how I don’t even take in other peoples’ shapes or size at all!

      And yes, you can ALWAYS wear a pink skirt in my book. Pink is my favourite colours now a days!!

  4. I’ll hop on that limo with you. Let’s have fun. Like big time! Go out and eat pizza, then take fun pics and finish the night off at a night club. About your question… the camera is the same old.

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